Leaving any unhealthy relationship is challenging, but extricating yourself from a relationship with a narcissist can feel nearly impossible. Survivors often describe the experience as confusing, traumatic and isolating and, despite being aware that something is deeply wrong, find themselves trapped in a cycle of hope, fear and self-doubt.

Recognising why it’s so difficult to leave a narcissistic relationship requires an exploration of the psychological manipulation tactics narcissists use to maintain control—such as smear campaigns, triangulation, social ostracism and hoovering—as well as the deep emotional bonds and trauma responses these relationships create.

Recovering from narcissistic abuse is a complex and deeply personal journey. Unlike other forms of emotional trauma, abuse by a narcissist can leave you grappling with confusion, self-doubt and a shattered sense of identity.

In this article, I will talk through how various forms of therapy—including talking therapy, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), narrative therapy, trauma-focused therapy and narcissistic abuse-informed life coaching—can help you on your path to recovery.

Gaslighting doesn’t look like clear-cut verbal or physical abuse. But that makes it all the more insidious as it is a form of systematic and hugely damaging psychological abuse. It can manifest as seemingly small comments, denials or contradictions that chip away at your confidence and sense of self.

Many people who experience gaslighting don’t recognise it until some serious emotional harm has been done, leaving you with deep seated trauma, often in the form of PTSD or CPTSD.

Narcissism is associated with self-centeredness, a lack of empathy and an inflated sense of self-importance. However, not all narcissists are the same. So if you have found yourself questioning if your partner, family member, friend or colleague is a narcissist but they don’t quite fit the bill, keep reading as they may be a covert narcissist.